Saturday, July 26, 2008

Part 3 - A Day at the Campus, A Night at the Strip Club

(Please read Parts 1 and 2 before reading this installment)

Part 1 - Dave Gives Kathy Some Time and Space

Part 2 - Kathy Moves On But Dave Needs a Push


After the hockey game, Dave leaves a sober message for Kathy. The next night's bachelor party lives up to it's promise of reckless behavior.

INT. DAVE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Dave enters. He is just returning from the hockey game. He throws his keys to where the hall table used to be, only to have the keys hit the ground and slide across the floor and disappear under the old couch.

Dave sighs. He walks into the kitchen, opens the fridge and finds no beer. He walks back to the living room, passing the phone on the floor. He sits on the couch, but there is no TV to watch.
After a moment, he gets up and goes over to the phone. He pauses, then dials.

DAVE
Hi Kathy, it’s me, Dave. Hope you’re
doing okay. Listen, I was just
hanging out, and I thought maybe, if
you weren’t busy, or were in the
mood, we could have one of those
“dates” you were talking about. I,
uh, don’t know if you remember
your terms, but I could make dinner
and if you wanted to, “stay after”
that would be okay. I mean, if you
wanted to. Anyway, you know how to
get a hold of me and I ’ll leave the
door unlocked if you get this
message late. So I look forward to…

The machine cuts him off with a BEEP.

DAVE (CONT’D)
Well , that could have been
smoother.

INT. ALLY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Ally enters. Her arms are full with her guitar case, a long jacket, shoulder bag etc. She is rushing to get to the phone before the message cuts off , but enters the room just as the beep is heard.

ALLY
Shit.

Ally puts down her stuff, hangs up her coat and plays the messages. The first message begins to play. It is a call from a nightclub. Kathy is shouting over the trob of loud dance music.

KATHY (ON PHONE)
Hey Babe, you are such a loser! Why
aren’t you out here tonight! Woo
Hoo! The guys are so fucking hot!
Here, talk to Peter…

We hear giggling and muffled talk as Kathy hands the phone over to
some guy she just met.

PETER (ON PHONE)
Hi Ally, Kathy says you’re hot. You
should come down to The Oasis and
we could get together. I bet you’ve
got a rockin’ ass. I’d sure like to…

Ally quickly hits the delete button to avoid hearing what this stranger would l ike to do to her ass.

ALLY
Ugh.

The second message begins to play. It is Dave’s message to Kathy. Ally listens and smiles a little. She plays it again. She goes to get a pad of paper and her guitar and plays it again. She begins to write a song using Dave’s message as the lyrics.

EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS - DAY
Dave and Steve are walking across campus carrying coffee.

STEVE
C’mon, you have to go.

DAVE
No

STEVE
You have to stop moping around and
get over her. It ’l l be fun.

DAVE
I can’t . I’m way behind on work. I’ve
got papers to grade and, I ’m not
getting any research done.

They pass a trio of co-eds on their way to class. Steve nearly breaks his neck turning around to ogle the girls as they go.

DAVE (CONT’D)
Why are you always here? Don’t you
have a job anymore?

STEVE
I’m taking a break. Kind of a
transition to a new venture. Besides...
I like the scenery.

A shapely co-ed jogs past them and gives Steve a smile. He watches her and falls into a bike rack. The harder Steve struggles to get up, the more tangled he gets in the bikes, cables etc.

STEVE (CONT’D)
Well , are you going to help me up?

DAVE
I’m considering. Hey, look at this…

Dave sees a flyer taped to a lamp pole advertising for a local coffee house. A small crowd has gathered around Steve.

STEVE
Move along people. There’s nothing
to see here.

A student from Dave’s class approaches Dave. He is wearing a varsity football jacket.

STUDENT
Do you need a hand Professor
Morgan?

DAVE
Oh, Parker, yes, can you help this
vagrant up before he wrecks
somebody’s bike.

STUDENT
Sure. C’mon guys.

The student is joined by two other football players. They grab Steve and lift him with such ease, he is nearly flung across the path. Dave hands Steve the flier.

DAVE
Here, Allison, Kathy’s old friend is
playing guitar at The Beanery.

STEVE
And?

DAVE
And Kathy might be there. I should
go see her. Maybe I could get her to
have Kathy call me.

STEVE
No way. If she’s Kathy’s friend, then
she must be just as big a bitch.
They travel in packs.

Steve crumples up the flier and tosses it in a trash can.

STEVE (CONT’D)
What you should do is come out
with us tonight and get some lap
dances.

DAVE
Okay, okay. Jesus, you’re not going
to leave me alone about it anyway.

STEVE
That’s the spirit . Take your mind of
the whole thing by letting the little
head do some thinking.

Another hot co-ed passes Steve and giggles.

STEVE (CONT’D)
(calling after the girl )
It’s not that little. It’s just an
expression. Like ‘let’s do lunch’ or
‘call me’.

DAVE
Or ‘Restraining Order’.

INT. STRIP CLUB - NIGHT
We see a crowded Wednesday night at the local strip club. It is dark, crowded and throbbing with cheesy dance music. Three small platforms each have a girl in lingerie gyrating around a pole. In the corner we see the stag party including the groom in a striped prison shirt . There is much hooting and hollering from this group in contrast to the creepy, low energy leering from the rest of the patrons lining the stage edge.

Dave, Steve, Toynebee and Picken enter.

M.C. (ON LOUDSPEAKER)
Gentlemen, let put your hands
together for our featured performer,
the reigning Miss Nude Wyoming,
the luscious Desire Delight!

A voluptuous girl in a slutty nurse uniform struts out on stage and begins her act .

TOYNEBEE
You gotta love culture.

STEVE
There’s Johnny.

Steve and Dave head over to the stag group, but Toynebee and Picken are transfixed by Miss Nude Wyoming.

STEVE
Hey John. You remember my buddy
Dave? He’s the one I was telling you
about.

JOHN
You bet. Good to see you. Sorry to
hear about your kick in the crotch.

DAVE
Thanks. Are you sure us being here
is okay with your bother?

JOHN
Everything’s been alright with Glen
for about an hour now.

We see the groom in the prison shirt getting a lap dance. He is a heartbeat away from passing out but is valiantly trying to stuff a dollar bill in the girl ’s thong. Steve hands Dave two beers.

STEVE
Here. We’ve got some catching up to do.

John hands Dave a shot glass of some very questionable looking liquor.

JOHN
Then you’ll need one of these too.

Dave shrugs and drinks the shooter. A second is thrust in his hand. From behind Dave appears a stripper with Picken and Toynebee.

PICKEN & TOYNEBEE
This is for you buddy.

The girl licks Dave’s ear before sliding down the side of his leg as she begins her private dance. Dave drinks the second shooter and the evening is underway.

INT. STRIP CLUB – NIGHT. VARIOUS
The evening becomes a sequence of lights, drinks, faces, boobs etc. as Dave gets hammered.

INT. STRIP CLUB – NIGHT.
Dave is in a booth with several ladies. Picken has long since passed out. Toynebee is at the next table involved in what appears to be a very intense conversation with some old drunk.
Dave notices a cell phone on the table and dials Kathy. He gets her voicemail message.

KATHY (ON PHONE)
Hi , I’m not in right not so leave me
a message.

DAVE
Hey Kath, Kat , Kitty Kat, this is Big
Daddy. There’s girls here and their
naked and you know what? I love
the big boobies, and there’s big
boobies in my face right now.
Waddya think of that? Oh and news
flash for you, belly button rings are
all the rage. You should get one. I’ll
ask Tiffany here where she got hers?
And you know what else? You had it
pretty good with me. And I always
got you off even though you said my
prick was too small . So here’s
Mister Tiny prick saying good bye
‘cause I have to get back to the big
boobies. Mmm, big boobies.

Dave hangs up and puts the phone back on the table. Steve appears with a tray of shooters.

STEVE
Who you calling?

DAVE
I can’t remember.

The party continues and the lights and colors until it eventually fades to black.

3 comments:

greedygrace said...

LOL! Love it! That's why you should never drink and dial!

Mama Dawg said...

I love it. Keep 'em coming.

sassy stephanie said...

Who needs books when you have this to read every day!