Saturday, August 9, 2008

Part 8 - The Mexican Standoff

(Please read the previous parts before reading this posting)

Part 1 - Dave Gives Kathy Some Time and Space

Part 2 - Kathy Moves On But Dave Needs a Push

Part 3 - A Day at the Campus, A Night at the Strip Club

Part 4 - A Cute Meet Before the Scales Fall

Part 5 - Dave Morgan: Man of Action

Part 6 - And the Band Played On

Part 7 - You Win Some, You Lose a Few More

Dave's notoriety continues to build while life on campus becomes more difficult.

EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS – DAY
Dave is walking back across the campus after his embarrassing chair climbing display. He passes near one of the parking lots and sees Steve standing by his car. As he walks closer, Dave can see the trunk of the car is open.

There is a cluster of students around the open trunk. Closer still , Dave can see Steve has the phone message shirts from earlier displayed on hangers all around the open trunk.

STEVE
Special offer today guys. Fifteen
bucks for one, twenty five for two.

DAVE
What are you doing?

STEVE
Kids, this is a real honor. Big Daddy
himself is here. For an extra five
dollars the man who loves big
boobies will autograph each one.
How’s that?

The group mummers their assent.

DAVE
I’m not signing anything.

STEVE
What if I let you keep the five
bucks?

Dave slams the trunk scattering the T-shirts on the ground. Steve has to duck out of the way to avoid having his fingers caught.

STEVE (CONT'D)
Hey, watch what you’re doing.
You’re going to wreck all my
merchandise.

KID IN CROWD
Whoa, not very cool Professor
Morgan.

DAVE
Don’t you guys have class, or
studying or an extasy rave to go to?
Go on.

The kids shuffle off reluctantly.

DAVE (CONT’D)
Why are you doing this to me? This
is where I work? I have to stand up
in front of these kids everyday and
they are not going to listen to me if
they think I’m thinking about their
tits. Well , half of them. I hate to
consider what the male half of the
room is thinking about.

Steve begins to pick up his shirts from the ground.

STEVE
This isn’t personal , it’s just
business.

DAVE
Of course it’s personal , it’s my life.

STEVE
It’s my life too Dave. This may all be
over in a week. I’ve got to make the
money now.

DAVE
Knowing you, you’d think of a way
to keep it going longer. Don’t call
me for awhile.

EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS – VARIOUS
The phone message has taken on a life of it’s own. Now there are posters not just on campus, but in town too.

INT. DAVE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Dave is slouched on his couch watching a late night talk show host.

HOST (ON TV)
Have you heard of this Big Boobies
ring tone that’s sweeping across the
country?

There is laughter and an applause of acknowledgment from the audience.

HOST (ON TV) (CONT’D)
This guy tells his ex-girl friend what
he really liked about her and she
showed her appreciation by having
it posted on the Internet. Did we
learn nothing from the Clinton
Administration?

Riotous laughter erupts.

HOST (ON TV) (CONT’D)
And it’s not just Big Boobies; there
are several ring tones about all
aspects of sex. Or should I say
positions.

The audience hoot luridly.

HOST (ON TV) (CONT’D)
There are so many ring tones, Paris
Hilton went out and bought a
different cell phone so she could hear
each one.

Riotous laughter erupts.

HOST (ON TV) (CONT’D)
Has anyone listened to the whole
message? Apparently the guy tried
to call Dr. Phil for help, but Dr. Phil
wouldn’t take the call when he saw
it was from “Big Daddy”.

Riotous laughter erupts with applause.

DAVE
Oh please. Those jokes aren’t even
funny.

Dave turns off the TV. He picks up the phone and begins to call Ally, but decides against it and goes to bed.

INT. DAVE’S OFFICE – DAY
Dave comes into his office in the morning. He sees the red message light on his phone is BLINKING. He sighs and puts down his case heavily.

DAVE (TO HIMSELF)
That’s never good news.

Dave presses the speaker function and dials in to get his message.

MESSAGE VOICE
You have two new messages.
Message one:

ALLY (VOICE ON PHONE)
Hi Dave. I’m sorry I didn’t call . I’ve
been thinking and I’m sure you have
probably suffered enough with this
thing. And, well , I miss you. Call
me.

DAVE
Yes! Maybe this will be a good day.

MESSAGE VOICE
Message two:

SECRETARY (VOICE ON PHONE)
Dr. Morgan, the Dean would like to
see you. Your class schedule shows
you are free at 10:30. Please contact
me if this is not possible.

DAVE
Or maybe not.

INT. OFFICE OF THE DEAN – DAY
Dave enters the Dean’s office. The secretary that left the phone
message is sitting in the anteroom. She is busy typing.

DAVE
Excuse me. I’m hear to see Dean
Turner. I’m…

SECRETARY
(with disdain)
I know who you are. Everyone does.
You should be ashamed of yourself.

DAVE
It’s all a big misunderstanding,
really.

SECRETARY
You can go in, but try not to touch
anything.

DAVE
Okay.

As he passes, he drags a finger across her desk. We hear the secretary INHALE sharply.

Dave opens the door to the Dean’s off ice and enters. Behind him, the secretary has grabbed a spray bottle of cleaner and is wiping her desk down.

The Dean is reading a file. It is a plush, well appointed office with plenty of books and comfortable leather armchairs.

DAVE
Dean Turner?

DEAN TURNER
Professor Morgan. Come in.

Dave steps towards an overstuffed leather armchair in front of the Dean's desk. He begins to sit, but is interrupted by the Dean midway to the seat.

DEAN TURNER (CONT’D)
Don’t sit. This won’t take long.

DAVE
(awkwardly)
Okay…

Dave slowly straightens up.

DEAN TURNER
How long have you been with this
institution?

DAVE
Six years Sir. Not counting my
undergraduate four years before I
went to Stanford for my graduate
work.

DEAN TURNER
So nearly ten years.

DAVE
Yes Sir.

DEAN TURNER
And in a l that time did you come to
think of this university as a place of
loose morals?

DAVE
No Sir.

DEAN TURNER
Or perhaps an establishment rife in
practitioners of lascivious behavior?
Or a place to “get your freak on”, as
you people say these days?

DAVE
No Sir. No one I know would use
that phrase. Maybe my friend
Toynebee does but I’m pretty sure
he has a mental condition. Mild and
treatable but still…

The Dean raises his hand and Dave stops his embarrassed rambling.

DEAN TURNER
Professor Morgan, we have always
had a certain tolerance for
immature behavior from the
students, but it cannot be tolerated
from the staff.

DAVE
Sir, I understand and i f you’ll let me
explain…

DEAN TURNER
As much as I don’t like it, a
professor’s private life is his own
business, but when you begin to
make your questionable lifestyle
public…

DAVE
I wouldn’t go so far as to call my
lifestyle “questionable”...

DEAN TURNER
Or attempt to at tack a student
during class…

DAVE
I think “attack” is a pretty strong
word…

DEAN TURNER
Or hoping to profit from your
deplorable conduct…

Dean Turner holds up one of Steve’s T-shirts.

DEAN TURNER (CONT’D)
Then we have to re-consider your
association here.

DAVE
The T-shirts aren’t mine. The whole
stupid thing is a friend of mine's
demented idea of capitalism.

DEAN TURNER
Another of these friends you “hang
out” with at your “gentlemen’s
clubs”?

DAVE
That night wasn’t even my idea.

Dean Turner tosses a stack of papers across his desk towards Dave.

DEAN TURNER
All those letters are from parents
upset that we would employ a man
of your character here.

The Dean tosses a pile of phone message slips.

DEAN TURNER (CONT’D)
And that’s a fraction of the phone
cal ls from alumni threatening to
pull their donations. Do you realize
you don’t have tenure here yet?

DAVE
Yes Sir. I mean, no Sir. I… I don’t
know what to say.

Dave moves to pick up the stack of letters. He notices that the Dean has knocked over a small picture on his desk. Dave picks it up. It is a picture of a beautiful girl around fi fteen, dressed in a
school uniform.

DEAN TURNER
Put that down. That’s a picture of
my granddaughter.

There is something familiar about the girl in the picture, but he can’t think of what it is.

DEAN TURNER (CONT"D)
Morgan, she’s not the sort of girl
you should be thinking about.
CUT TO:
INT. STRIP CLUB – NIGHT
As Dave struggles to place the girl in the picture we see a blurry memory of the stag night (similar to how he remembered the phone call) . We see Dave sitting at the booth, a topless girl sitting on his lap writhing up and down.

We head Dave on the phone repeating: “Oh and news flash for you, belly button rings are all the rage. You should get one. I’ll ask Tiffany here where she got hers” As we see the girl in heavy make-up and teased hair, the image softens to the pretty, demure school girl in the photo.

CUT TO:
INT. DEAN’S OFFICE – DAY
DAVE
Your granddaughter’s name wouldn’t
happen to be Tiffany would it?

DEAN TURNER
How, how do you know that?

DAVE
(under his breath)
I can’t believe she uses her real
name.

DEAN TURNER
Her real name? Of course it’s her
real name.

DAVE
Tiffany Turner is such a stripper
name.

DEAN TURNER
Don’t make me call campus
security.

DAVE
Your sweet little Catholic school girl
granddaughter is saving up for
college by taking her clothes off.
She even wears her uniform in her
act. I’ll tell you this: she’s awfully
mature for her age.

The Dean is apoplectic with shock. Dave tosses the picture back to him and the Dean catches it
clumsily.

DAVE (CONT’D)
Tell you what Dean, you call
Tiffany’s parents, get the girl a job
at Dairy Queen, and I’ll forget the
whole thing if you get off my back.
Deal?

The Dean nods.

DAVE (CONT’D)
Good. Nice meeting with you. Let’s
do it again soon.

Dave rises and walks to the door. He pauses as he opens the door.

DAVE (CONT’D)
What to go take in some peelers? Maybe not.
FADE OUT.

7 comments:

sassy stephanie said...

Uh huh, then?...

Mandi said...

Im with sassy stephanie.........next??????????

Trooper Thorn said...

Thanks for the notes. I added a bit more to the end to close the scene out.

Mama Dawg said...

Nice twist...didn't see that one coming!

Oh, and here's an off the wall suggestion for Ally....Michelle Williams. She has that soft kind of forgiving look about her but she can be quite funny when given the chance.

She's not the first one I'd pick, but maybe she could be a contender.

Mandi said...

Hey when you get this made into a movie, can I play the ex girlfriend!!! ha ha ha ha I think I could do bitch really well!!!

Trooper Thorn said...

It's fine with me Mandi, but you'll have to run it past Mama Dawg. She's in charge of casting.

Part 9 going up......

Brittany said...

Welll.....thanks for getting me hooked on that! Great post!